Insanity

For those of you who have read my blog faithfully, you know how brutally honest I strive to be here, how I endeavor to give voice to the most painful and, some might say, the most humiliating and unflattering aspects of myself as I flounder through the journey that is living with cancer – the rage, jealousy, bitterness, terror and sorrow. While I write and share the ugliest parts of this journey in a way that I could never verbalize accurately or completely for my own cathartic reasons (among others), I share also because I know that such brute honesty validates the dark emotions of those who feel as I do as they stumble through their own trials and tribulations, whether they be cancer related or not. And in that validation, you and I, we, regardless of whether we’ve ever met in person, find a connection, a oneness in our suffering that speaks to the universal human experience, which transcends class, race, culture, time and space. I want you all to know that it is to this connection, this sense of oneness, that I cling as the loneliness of this journey threatens to swallow me, especially during these past couple weeks. For the first time in this multi-year struggle with cancer, I find myself ever closer to a lonely insanity. More

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