The Crossroads of the World

A crossroad is a place where multiple roads converge, a milestone of sorts marking the end of one phase and the beginning of another, a point at which a decision needs to be made about what road to take next as one continues on the journey.  When my final day of chemo (hopefully) arrived on January 13, it certainly felt like a milestone, the end of one thing (certainly this cycle of chemo) and the beginning of something else, a decision point where scans would soon follow and I, Josh and my doctor would have to decide what to do next as we continue this ongoing war.  So somehow it felt right that I should end up at Times Square on that last day of chemo, for Times Square – perhaps one of the most famous places on earth – is known as the Crossroads of the World.  More

Slipping the Surly Bonds of Earth to Touch the Face of God

I traveled to Antarctica a little over eight years ago.  There, in the midst of its vast unearthly and breathtaking beauty, I felt as I had never before the presence of a higher power so much greater than myself, and in so doing, like perhaps I was glimpsing another planet, another dimension, possibly the afterlife.  In this week during which I celebrated my 38th birthday, observed the six-month anniversary of my cancer diagnosis, continue to process and prepare for the impending death of Kathryn Finn-Blume (who I mentioned in my previous post) and learned of the cancer-related deaths of two individuals, one of whom was a veritable celebrity in the colorectal cancer community and the other I had known and worked with shortly before my unexpected diagnosis, I’ve been thinking a lot about my time in Antarctica, trying to use that profound experience to make sense of life and death.  More

A Dance Between Two Worlds

[It’s been 2.5 weeks since my last post.  Kids being home from school, the holidays and the general craziness of this time of year really interfered with writing.  To make up for the extended silence, this post is a bit long and covers a broad range of topics.  I will also endeavor to write more this week as next week promises to be another quiet week as one of my dearest cousins is coming all the way from LA to be with me for my final chemo treatment and spend the week helping and hanging out with me.  Happy New Year to all and thank you for reading.]

The girls and I baked thick and chewy chocolate chip cookies for Santa this year.  Santa seemed grateful because he was very generous to my girls – a wooden medieval princess castle replete with turrets, a functioning drawbridge and matching miniature furniture and figurines, a pink nylon tent with windows and a door where they can hide and pretend to their hearts’ delight, a Tinker Bell tea set (because Isabelle is absolutely in love with Tink), a shopping cart that converts into a kitchen complete with stove, sink and clock.  Since Santa and his elves were so overwhelmed this year, Mommy was up until 4 a.m. helping Santa wrap his many gifts (not to mention the many from Mommy and Daddy), all while catching up on this season of Grey’s Anatomy.  Gifts were torn into early Christmas morning, leaving our living space a mess of plastic toy pieces, packaging, wrapping paper and ribbons.